Harboring unforgiveness in your heart will keep the fire of anger raging and will ultimately destroy you. The stakes are high. Forgiving, or the lack there of, is not to be taken lightly. There is a reason that Jesus included it in the prayer He taught His disciples: Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.
Forgiven people forgive people. One of the outflows of personal repentance is the ability to forgive others, but our ability to do so is not "feeling" based. Forgiveness is a choice that leads to feelings NOT a feeling that leads to choice. There is a big difference. If you are waiting to extend forgiveness until you feel like it, you will be waiting the rest of your life.
I used to have three sets of clothes in my closet sarcastically labeled as the following: In Shape; Not in Shape but Not Terrible; and Terribly out of shape! At one point I could only wear a third of my clothes. Maybe you can relate?
This all changed recently due to some weight loss and getting back into shape. Sadly, though, I kept wearing the same "one-third" of my clothes because I had grown so accustomed to not fitting into the other clothes. One day I finally decided to try on one of the "in shape" shirts. To my surprise it fit perfectly. I guess I had not realized just how much I had changed. I was a different person now but was still wearing my old clothes.
I think we sometimes do the same thing with forgiveness. It didn't "fit us" years ago so we assume the same for today, but you are a different person now. What at one time was impossible to put on has now become a custom-designed fit for you. God has a way of doing that.
No one can put the clothing of forgiveness on you. Everyone must choose for themselves. For those who courageously choose the path of forgiveness - even to those who do not deserve it or may throw it back in your face - there is freedom and peace. If it were not so, God would not be modeling and commanding forgiveness.
Ex nihilo,
R.J. Rhoden
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